Remember the SBY Girl, Fish, who got yelled at for Schwartz’s class-cutting?
Well, turns out that wasn’t the end of the story. Poor Schwartz may have gotten yelled at for Fish’s misdemeanors as well.
In my particular Bais Yaakov school we were allowed to go out during lunch to any of the local eateries. However, going out during our breaks were not allowed. But who are we kidding? With a grocery literally next door, it was just too easy to slip out for a much needed boost of energy during the day.
So one day there I am contemplating sneaking out during break — and by contemplating I mean I am in middle of walking down the stairs and out the door — and I head into Ruden’s next door. I took some time wandering up and down the aisles, evaluating my options. During a particularly complicated decision (do I succumb to that Milk Munch temptation? Maybe I can pretend that the 206 calories in the mini bar really reads 06 calories?) I sense a presence near me.
I look up… And there is Mrs. Green standing there, arms folded, eyes trained on me in ill-disguised fury (and did I detect some delight as well?). My heart literally froze. Like that feeling when fear just overtakes you and you’re frozen in time?
“What do we have here?” she said. “Do I … See… a student… In the grocery during recess?!” She said alternating between pauses and loud emphasis to dramatize the situation. My only hope was that she wouldn’t remember me amongst all the students in the school. But that last hope was quickly squashed as she shouted: “And don’t think I don’t know exactly who you are. You were in my office at the beginning of the year just some time ago weren’t you?!!!”
Even if I wanted to say something I don’t know if my tongue would have been able to move at this point. I looked around the store for some salvation but none seemed apparent. (Mr. Ruden became very busy ringing up orders and even proceeded to do some bookkeeping so as to appear oblivious to the situation.)
“You’re just lucky that I don’t want you to be late to the next class or I would continue this conversation right here. But don’t worry we’ll continue this in my office.” I somehow managed to nod and, satisfied that she delivered enough fear for the moment, Mrs. Green turned and began to head out.
I visibly began breathing again. I couldn’t help worrying about the trouble I was in when Mrs. Green reached the door and cast one glance backward and said “And don’t think I’ll forget… Schwartz.”
I look up and nod solemnly while inside I explode. NO… Wait a second… Could I have been that lucky? Did she actually say Schwartz? Omg omg yes she definitely said Schwartz not Fish. Ha! Whew.
And that’s how I escaped discipline for the sin of visiting the grocery during recess.